pixieledmemes | Test Drive Meme #2

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!tdm

Test Drive Meme #2

TDM #2 - March/April 2025

🦋 Introduction

Welcome to the Pixie Led Test Drive Meme!

The prompts will always be game canon, provided both characters who participate in a thread are either already in the game, or get accepted in the next application round.

You do not need an invitation to join the Test Drive Meme, it's open for anyone!

Please indicate character name and canon in the subject line of your top-level. For current characters, you may also indicate your character's court.

For prospective players, Invites open on the 18th, Reserves on the 20th, and Applications on the 22nd. Thanks for checking us out and we hope you'll join us!

🦋 The Party

You wake up at a party.

You're not sure how, exactly, you got here. You may have just been walking in the woods or at a meeting for work or doing any other normal activity for you. But you know you weren't supposed to be at this party, you're fairly certain.

Anyone you ask about it will say the party is for you. You and the others also waking up and looking confused. Further questions will lead to the partygoers insisting you have something to eat. You're starving and others are eating the food without repercussion, so you figure there's no harm in a bite. You finish your portion.

It's a garden party at the crack of dawn, with the sun still in its early stages of climbing through the yonder, casting a good mix of pastel hues of blue, pink, and beige on everything. Heralding the first day of spring, the Ruler of the Spring Court has found it fitting to arrange this gathering where guests can feel the blades of grass touching their ankles, as well as the rich soil beneath their feet. Flowers of all kinds surround the party as if they were carefully curated. With spring as the "dawn of seasons," which marks a transition from winter's latency to the resurgence of life everywhere, the Ruler of the Dawn Court has also seen it fit to host aspects of this party during the one time of the year that dawn occurs the whole day. Tall candles and torches grace the outskirts of the garden party, providing warmth and an orange glow everywhere. Not one flame goes out even with the occasional wind, the Duchess always makes sure of this.

There are also freshly picked blossoms and branches with leaves on every table accenting the festive spread of food and drinks. This time, a lot of the food prepared for the Adopted guests are familiar to them with a little bit of a twist. Burgers might come in small packages and in toothpicks, while hotdogs in buns are also diminutive. Cookies look delectable but they have a flowery flavor to them, as if eating freshly picked daisies or daffodils. Fruits that may have been present in an Adopted's home, such as pineapples and watermelons, have seeds in odd places. Picking this selection of food is an attempt to be more welcoming and to appease the lovely guests the fae have invited.

As the party winds down and everyone's eaten, a tall, stately woman stands up and speaks. You feel her voice more than hear it.

I am the Lawspeaker of the Fae, elected by Seelie and Unseelie alike, and you are all, now, subjects of Faerie. You cannot leave this realm once you have eaten our food, and even if you could, there is no saying how much time has passed back where you're from. Your loved ones are likely dead, your problems have likely played out. We require assistance in various matters, and each of you has been chosen for your talent and skill. You will be adopted by one of the Seelie or Unseelie Courts based on your strengths and personality. Your Court will decide what to do with you from there.

As suddenly as she stood, she sits back down.

🦋 Chance at a Dance

A party is not complete without dancing, of course, and while during the last gathering held for the Adopted, different fae danced to music exclusively for them around a glowing tree, this time they are insisting their guests to join in.

This is a party for you, after all.

If the prodding of the different fae hosts won't convince you, perhaps the music will. They play easily recognizable tunes that their wonderful guests must have heard before. These melodies have certain unique effects to their mortal attendees, which are as follows:

Upbeat Music: You will believe that you and your dance partner have been friends forever and have known each other a long time.
Romantic Music: You will become amorous and flirtatious towards your dance partner.
Slow Music: You will develop some tension with your dance partner. It may be negative or sexual; completely up to you.
Quiet Music: You will assume your dance partner is a threat and try to fight them.

🦋 Flower Power

At the Spring King's behest, every Adopted should wear a flower corsage or boutonnière to the gathering. After all, this is to celebrate the coming of spring and what better way to do that than to honor everything in bloom.

The thing is, though, the King of Spring, while amorous and friendly, also has a penchant for playing with mortals' memories, if not also affect their desires and despairs.

So, mischievous as he is, he made sure to enchant the different flowers present in every corsage and boutonnière for the party with the effects below:

Rose: You will recall a horrific trauma
Carnation: You will see a vision of your future, whether it's good or bad
Orchid: You will remember a time you lost someone
Chrysanthemum: You will believe someone among the Adopted is your soulmate
Dahlia: You will believe you betrayed someone important to you, whether you actually did or not

It is perhaps a good thing that no one but the Adopted are allowed to see these visions and memories, but everyone who wears a corsage or boutonnière will be able to see each other's memories and visions when in close enough physical proximity to the vision-haver, for better or for worse.

🦋 GEIS

You feel a vibration in your pocket sometime after the Lawspeaker addresses everyone. When you search for the source, you will pull out your Leaf, the device the Fae use to stay in touch with each other. Anyone who's used a smart phone will easily recognize how it works.

Greetings, Adopted. This is your Lawspeaker.

Tell us all of a time you gave someone a gift. Perhaps a bouquet of flowers or a box of chocolates. Was it appreciated or not? A reward might await the most meaningful gift given.

🦋 Link to Overflow Post

ｎａｖｉｇａｔｉｏｎ

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ their first kiss is over so quickly that he can almost convince himself it didn't actually happen—that the food he ate in this place is making him hallucinate, or maybe even that this whole thing has been a dream all along, and now that Erwin has kissed him it's time for him to wake up alone in the real world.

their second kiss is something much, much harder to dismiss as a bittersweet mind trick. it isn't until then that he finally closes his eyes rather than stare wide-eyed in bewilderment, finally finds Erwin's face with his hands and kisses him back with everything he has. it's 100% enthusiasm and 0% skill, but that's fine.

hopefully.

by the time it's over, his eyes burn with tears he's too stubborn to shed. he lets out a breath that sounds somewhere between a laugh and a sigh of relief, and drops his head forward into Erwin's shoulder. ]

I've loved you for as long as I can remember.

[ no one could tell, surely. ]

[ no one could possibly tell. it would have been a mystery for all time if levi had never said it.

erwin is smiling. he tips his head toward levi's, temple resting against his hair, and doesn't say anything for a long moment. his arm drops to wrap around his waist, keeping him close, so he's certainly not opposed to what's been said.

at length: ]

I don't know how long it's been for me either.

[ but that doesn't matter, does it? not anymore, at least. they're here, together, and even if this place is some kind of shitshow, well, where they came from was a shitshow as well. ]

Never having said anything about it feels foolish, now.

[ a choice with one (1) regret. on erwin's part, at least; he's not judging levi for whatever reasons he had for never saying anything. they may, in fact, both be stupid, but sometimes even stupid people get happy endings like several impossible things happening to facilitate seeing each other again. ]

[ from a purely selfish perspective, he wishes Erwin had told him, but it's not that hard to figure out why he didn't. Erwin is (was?) his superior. he doesn't give a shit, of course, but maybe that's easier for him to say as the subordinate.

regardless, he didn't say anything, either. it doesn't really matter anymore whether he regrets it or not, but he feels like he owes Erwin some kind of explanation.

it's not like he ever expected to have the chance. ]

I... thought it would make everything harder for you if I did. I'm not confident that was the right decision. I went back and forth on it so many times after—

[ after you were gone. nah, he's just going to leave it there. his right hand travels down to Erwin's side, to where he was fatally wounded, halfway expecting it to open up all over again.

he holds it there, just in case. ]

[ it was a complicated situation even at points where it shouldn't have been. erwin is (was) levi's direct superior, the reason he joined the corps in the first place, someone he relied on to be steadfast and honest and...

well, not telling levi anything for so long was pretty damn dishonest, but that thought process means in another way entirely.

and it's not like levi's ever been afraid to say something when he thinks erwin's being an idiot for real, but despite all the smarts in his head, that'd still be a weird little thing in his chest he dealt with.

and yet, now, knowing they could have had so much more time... it's a lot to consider. ]

We're here now. That's what matters.

[ here, they've said it. none of the things that were a blockade before matter now.

he exhales slowly when levi's hand lands at his side: the muscles stretch and relax like they should. nothing old OR new opens up. ]

[ he can feel that there's nothing there, but again, just in case, he draws his hand back to make absolutely sure.

when there's no blood to be found, he smiles. when was the last time he smiled? he can't even recall. ]

Yeah. You're right.

[ as always. he lifts the same hand to reach up and touch Erwin's face, reverent but almost tentative, like he's still not quite convinced it's something he's allowed to do. he's done it once before, but by then Erwin was already gone.

being able to do it again and feel warmth this time is overwhelming, in the best possible way. ]

I can't believe you're real.

I do like being right.

[ yeah, the touching experience is clean and dry. the muscle and flesh beneath were solid and remain so even now. erwin smiles too, seeing levi. it's a good look on him. he uses his own hand to touch the line of levi's jaw lightly, then settle his palm there, mirroring how levi's touching his. ]

I'm glad to be. I'm sure most people here would rather go home, but that's because their home isn't here.

[ erwin are you saying—yeah he is. that's either the smoothest thing anyone has ever said or the cheesiest. ]

[ his brows furrow a little because he doesn't quite follow what Erwin's saying. of course he doesn't; why would he? nobody's ever said that kind of shit to him before.

processing, please hold. . .

—oh. oh, Erwin's saying his home is actually a person, and that person is him. that's—that's fine, like, if he heard someone say it to a third party he'd definitely scowl and roll his eyes, but—

but it's a little different when it's the love of your life, who you've been grieving for for years, saying it to you, isn't it?

he's not going to fucking cry again, but he does flush, and he seems to know it, dipping his head down a little as if Erwin wouldn't notice the fact that he's still smiling either way. ]

Stupid.

[ he's going to have to learn how to properly express his feelings one of these days. ]

[ the fact that not only is levi still smiling, he's flushing a little, just makes erwin breathe out a fond, quiet laugh.

if he really thinks about it, he can't remember the last time it's been so easy to just do that, especially not to have it tinged with some other emotion.

when was it? he doesn't know. ]

Maybe. I've been called worse.

[ or erwin can just read between the lines like he's so good at doing. ]

[ okay, now he'll scowl, like he's offended by the notion that he would ever insult Erwin for real. ]

I'm not calling you stupid.

[ he draws Erwin's face down to kiss him softly. it's meant to be quick, but he ends up lingering there for an extra moment or two. can he really just do this whenever he wants? ]

You just say stupid shit sometimes.

[ yeah, or, he doesn't actually think it's stupid at all and he's just covering for his own ineptitude at processing complex emotions. one of those. ]

I know.

[ he's still smiling as he returns the kiss, happy to lean down to accommodate it. it's a strange feeling to have time. to know they have time.

fucked up, right?

anyway, he almost snorts but manages to keep it in. ]

Close enough. I understood your meaning.

[ see: levi doesn't have to be amazing at processing or expressing those emotions right away. there's a reason they work so well together. ]

[ of course he did. he always does.

he always does, but even if Levi often feels like Erwin can read his mind, sometimes there are things he thinks Erwin still needs to hear. there are so many things over the past four years that he wished he could have told him, and now he can. it will take him awhile to remember them all.

there's one thing above all, though—he kind of said it already, but kind of isn't good enough. not for this.

he looks at Erwin for another moment, just taking the time to remember his face. he didn't even have a picture of him after he was gone. ]

I love you.

[ for as long as he agonized over telling him when Erwin was alive, it's the easiest thing he's ever said. ]

[ sure, levi didn't have a picture. but it's not like he forgot. erwin is exactly as he was before that day, right down to the clarity in his eyes and the slight curve to his mouth.

the curve that widens with what levi says, his head tipping in toward him, chuckle a little shaky. just once. ]

I love you too.

[ easy to say, a balm to hear. after all that, after everything, being here now, like this, is worth it. ]

[ of course he could never really forget, but having nothing to look back on... sucked. a lot. the fact that one of the first things he saw after Erwin's death was a photograph but no one would ever be able to take one of him while he was alive...

oof.

that shit doesn't matter anymore, though. he has something a million times better than a photograph. he doesn't care even a little bit that all of this is taking place at a party and they're surrounded by other people while they're having this overwhelmingly-emotional reunion, kissing, professing their love, definitely not crying—they're private people, yes, but he can't imagine stopping himself to go find a more private place after seeing the man he loved alive again.

sometimes public displays of affection are acceptable, as it turns out.

hearing Erwin say I love you brings a smile back to his face. it's a warm and deeply soothing feeling. he could definitely get used to it. ]

I don't even know what to do now.

[ he's not sure if it matters. ]

[ that is difficult. so much of levi's life was difficult to start with, much less how losing erwin must have felt. erwin will have to think on it later, piece things together in his head, but for now he's just going to focus on this, on being here together, on having... a chance, maybe, finally.

he's not sure he could ever get sick of seeing levi smile, frankly.

with that in mind, he shakes his head slightly at the comment about not knowing what to do. ]

I don't think we have to.

[ he's used to having to get by without Erwin's guidance after four years without him, but it's kind of funny how quickly he resumed the practice of seeking it as his first instinct. it's hardly a surprise that that part of him never actually went away—it was just dormant, and now that the impossible has taken place and Erwin is back with him, he's right back on his bullshit.

it feels so much more comfortable this way.

that said, Erwin is undoubtedly right about this, too: they don't have to know what to do. they can just... live.

it's going to take a while for that to sink in. ]

Then I'll just do what I've always done.

[ follow. ]

[ just living really is going to be a foreign concept for a long time. it's something they're going to have to fit themselves into, work to learn the ways of. ironic, maybe, to have to teach themselves how to relax.

but it's a start, and a good one.

something about what levi says sticks with erwin and he tilts his head to watch him a moment, thoughtful. ]

I like to think we can stand side by side for the duration.

[ they're equals, here. erwin's always thought of them as equals, but he clearly also knows levi's thoughts on the matter owing to his commentary. together is what really matters, though. ]

[ he's not surprised to hear Erwin say something like this. to some extent, he already knows Erwin sees them as equals; he's given Levi orders, of course, but they've always had complete trust in each other.

even so, he's never seen them as equals.

for a moment he's quiet, like he doesn't quite know how to respond. even if it isn't a surprise to him, it's still difficult to explain why he feels the way he does.

finally, he ventures: ]

I think... part of the reason I never told you was because I didn't feel like I was good enough. I knew I was good enough to fight for you, but beyond that...

[ he swallows, gaze drifting off to the side while he tries to figure out how to word the rest of what he wants to say. ]

I've always seen you as something more than me. Rank had nothing to do with it. I didn't think it was my place to be that person to you, no matter how badly I wanted to be.

[ and yet, seeing Erwin with someone else would have shattered him. great plan, man. ]

I've always seen us as equals.

[ immediately. and he means in every way, not just one or the other. there's no one erwin has ever or will ever place as much faith in as he does levi, and even to an outsider it'd be obvious just how earnest he is about it.

he lifts his hand to grip levi by the chin and turn his head until his gaze is back on erwin's face. not forcing, but he doesn't have to. knew he wouldn't as soon as he had the thought to. ]

I was afraid of it at any point feeling as if rank was being abused in some way. I know that's a foolish thing to have worried about, but I was using it to lie to myself and not say anything.

[ naturally, there's no resistance when Erwin tips his head upwards. his hand comes to rest on Erwin's arm, but there's nothing behind that either.

he may just be looking for excuses to keep touching him at this point. ]

It's not foolish.

[ or... it is, all things considered, but he knows how Erwin feels about himself painfully well. of course he convinced himself it would be inappropriate; even if Erwin knows deep down that Levi would never see it that way, he has a negative enough view of himself that it's not surprising this was his reason for not speaking up. ]

I get it. If anything, it just means I'm the one who should have said something, but I never really thought that might have been what was going on. I always thought it was just me.

[ who felt this way, he means. again, why would Erwin stoop to his level?

(not a short joke.) ]

[ touching and being touched, especially in ways like this where affection is evident in a scenario where nothing life-shattering is happening, strikes a chord. having gotten this far in life (and, uh, otherwise) without it seems immaterial now. he doesn't want to go back to that, but it doesn't matter when they have this now.

or... it does matter, but in a way that's difficult for erwin to explain even to himself.

at levi's assessment, he shakes his head. ]

It was never just you, but we both had our reasons for not saying anything.

[ even if yours also was completely incorrect, is the implication there. ]

[ it's all he can do to not chide himself internally for not knowing better. who knows Erwin better than him? how could he have had no clue?

self-loathing is a very powerful thing, and the worst part is that Erwin's is far, far worse. he's going to do something about that, though, now that he has the chance he never thought he'd have. he'll probably never be able to get Erwin to see himself the way he does, but he'll be damned if he isn't going to try anyway.

he smiles again, lifting his free hand to touch Erwin's face. ]

We have a lot of time to make up for, then, don't we?

[ it doesn't even matter what kind of place this is. it has Erwin. why would he care about the rest? ]

[ it's an interesting balancing act they're going to end up having. both of them trying to remind the other one that their self-loathing is wrong while trying to hold onto their own. something's got to give eventually, and thankfully in their case it stands that they've known each other long enough, and had enough time of trusting one another implicitly and explicitly that instead of a breakdown, they'll both, eventually, at least kinda sorta, hate themselves less.

or at least that's the hope. ]

We do. I trust we'll be able to manage it.

[ or die trying—wait, no, not that. definitely not that. ]

We should look into getting settled when we can.

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Test Drive Meme #2

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